, ,

I hide in life. Everyday. I don’t know that I’m doing it so it’s not really calculated. It’s more of a survival instinct that doesn’t go away. Kind of like the jump effect that happens when people quietly sidle up to me and either touch or speak to me all of a sudden. I scream and jump. People think it’s funny (and I really wish it was a jump/scream/punch reaction because let’s see how chucklicious that would be.) It can ruin my day, my blood pressure and even my relationships. And you thought I was going to say my pants.

I’ve been avoiding many issues that I originally started this blog for. And I don’t feel like listing them à la group therapy style. I was hoping that I would write about my life and those things would just bleed through. Well let it bleed…

The journaling was suppose to do the same but as I go through at least 5 years of various journal entries I don’t see much cohesion and some of the most important dark parts play in my head and not on the page where I’d rather they be. Am I so shy? You would think. In reality I have no problem being blunt. Talking is different than writing though. Anyone have ideas on how to address writing the past elegantly?