Do you ever get that feeling that you are going to fall off the edge of something like when you sit on a school chair and tip back and all of a sudden immediate vertigo, you are going to fall over and hurt yourself but good? That’s the point I’m at in this episode today. With the hypomania my outlook is positive and I am steady on my feet and it’s all taken for granted. I know where I’m going, I know what my point is, I feel at one with the world if not at peace with it.
But today, today is the turning point. The tipping the disconnection the estrangement that takes over my mind and influences my actions.
It’s different from disassociation although I can disassociate while this part of the episode occurs. It’s not anxiety though I often feel anxious while this happens. I think the isolation will be coming soon. So I apologize in advance if I can’t keep it together for this blog.